Read Reread Read More

Just this weekend was the BookExpo America. OK, right, so? So it was the sheer cultural dominance of America that I knew the event had 30,000 booksellers/publishers attending, was held in New York, and spawned countless articles lamenting the death of reading.

The American press was quick to declare not just the death of reading, but also the the death of browsing. Earlier there were speculations (inaccurate) that digital books inour PDAs would render books (lovely paper, binding, jackets and...dust) obsolete. Even earlier, of course, we have already been told that that the author is dead - though the author still outlived God.

But despite such pronouncements, that weekend I called up a defence:

1. I marched to Kino, browsed, bought 2 books and read Toni Morrison's "The Dancing Mind", in which she described as "disability" a privileged and successful young man's lack of acquanintance with the experience of reading for hours and hours in the company of his own mind.

2. Home and online, I discovered Tym's own adventure, rereading the tracks that memory had left across her bookshelves. Some of them are memories I share...the Robert-Lowell-phase for example. Heh.

3. Both of the above sent me on a hunt for RK Narayan's wonderful little essay about his attempt to clear out his library, changing his mind (possessiveness? nostlagia? greed?), postponing the disposal and finding, one day, that white ants have done what he didn't. How he makes me laugh!

4. Then I remembered Borges, appointed the Director of his country's National Library that same year he had started to become blind. A man who can no longer read, surrounded daily by 1 million books: "I was in charge of, I was told, a million books. Later I found out it was nine hundred thousand - a number that's more than enough. (And perhaps nine hundred thousand seems more than a million.)" - "Seven Nights".

5. Sunday night, reluctant to sleep, I decided to launch my very own reading campaign. And with Adobe Photoshop's help, enlist James as the new poster boy for the campaign. (Yes, if i-only-read-large-print James thinks reading is fun, you will too!)

So friends, don't believe those false obituaries. Spread the word, feel free to use the poster. Read.

The Secret of the Goatee

(This post is dedicated to our friend who runs a t-shirt shop in FarEast Shopping Centre. Ask and it shall be given.)

There is no self-respecting male creative type or wannebe creative type who has not tried growing a goatee (if he is not already the proud owner of one). Many have failed. Not because they lack the inspiration, the creative ability or the will power. But for the lack of good advice. Ampulets decided to conduct this interview with ourselves to reveal, once and for all, the secret to growing a healthy goatee.

Y(vonne): Hello, are you free? Can I ask you a few questions about your goatee.
J(ames): Can, I just finished doing my laundry.
Y: OK, good. I can't grow a goatee. Thank goodness. But can you tell me why and when you decided to grow one?
J: It's quite some time ago already. When I was in University.
Y: That's a very long time ago! And why?
J: Why? Er...could be...my ex. Oh oh. I think she suggested it.
Y: Oh......
J: No no, it was my decision.
Y: You sure?
J: Yes, yes, sure. It was to replace a moustache. Also I've always liked sideburns since I was young, all kinds.
Y: What a disappointing answer. Nothing to do with some latent creativity?
J: Yes, some of that too. It's an extension of my personality. Because I look like an ape. So anyone who grows one should think hard about how a goatee extends his personality. Not everyone will look good with one.
Y: Yes, not everyone looks like an ape! But what makes a good goatee?
J: A good goatee is one that you feel good about when you look in the mirror everyday.
Y: That's a boring answer!
J: But it's true. A goatee is something you have to love and treat well. You must take care of it and cultivate it. For example, you shampoo your hair daily and wash your face. For a goatee, it's very important to trim it. Trim your goatee.
Y: OK, that's if you already have one. What if someone without a goatee wants to grow one?
J: Well, firstly, growing a goatee for Asians takes a lot of patience, unless you have very dark roots.
Y: Is chest hair a prerequisite?
J: Hmm...yes. [Probably looking pleased with himself] Having chest hair means you'll have higher chance of growing a good goatee. You must have a little bit of the goatee gift from God. Some people say that you have to shave more often -
Y: That's like the reverse-psychology strategy!
J: [Ignoring Y] Others say use XO. But I have my own secret way to grow and keep a goatee looking good.
Y: So what's the secret?
J: Sorry, I can't say. I will only share it with the folks who are very serious about growing a goatee.
Y: What? But I already promised at the start that you will tell!
J: Cannot. I don't think it's right for everyone who is not serious about it to try and grow a goatee. It's not right.
Y: Huh? My blog post how? Say something leh.
J: "Be patient" and "Just let it grow".
Y: ... Bye.

Tell this to Donald Trump

Yesterday, a colleague circulated an article from Harvard Business Review "Breakthrough Ideas for 2004". One of those ideas is headlined "The MFA is the new MBA".

The source, American Dan Pink, claims that as only 3% of applicants are accepted into the Chicago Art Institute or UCLA's postgraduate Fine Arts Programme, versus Harvard Business School's 10%, MFAs are far more valuable to have than MBAs. This is evidenced by the fact that American employers are on the lookout for MFA grads (while MBAs in America lose their jobs to $800-a-month MBAs in India). He reasons that with an increasingly crowded marketplace, products & commercial offerings must now be "transcendent - physically beautiful and emotionally compelling". As such, MFA graduates are useful people to have around to bring this about for companies.



Of course, for a moment, those of us who are working on the Arts School project were determined to flash this piece of Harvard-endorsed scholarship in the faces of parents who worry that their 13 year olds will end up unemployed if they have an arts education, instead of something more "academic" or "entreprenuerial". But only for a moment lah.

However much I think art is important (and spending 3 years in a MFA programme would be a very sweet dream), I don't think I can ever subscribe to the ideas of someone who describes the iMac and General Motor's latest car design as transcendent. My iBook's great to use, but the day it transcends its material and functional reality to be emotionally compelling, its owner most likely would have just received her MFA from the Harvard Business School ;P