Tuesday, August 12, 2008

武林大会

The PW secret was thought to be destroyed by tight dragon after he was defeated by 铜子 years ago, but the fact was that tight dragon couldn't muster the courage to destroy the PW secret. Something that holds so much power within made it even harder to part with.

The night before his downfall, he secretly buried the PW secret beside an apple tree in the backyard of his fortress. He foresaw his downfall as he knew very well he was no match for 铜子's sheer strength. He anticipated the defeat and intended to retreat to his secluded hometown to buff himself up, reclaim the hidden PW secret and ultimately exterminate 铜子 once and for all. His plans were almost perfect, but little did he knew he was up for a little twist of fate. That is where our story begins...


The fateful night when tight dragon buried the PW secret in his courtyard beneath the apple tree, a bird by the name of Tweety was happily enjoying a shower at the fountain. He witnessed the scrawny tight dragon burying a secretive package, he was curious, but was frightened. At the other end of the courtyard, a cat named Sylvester also witnessed the act, he too was curious.

He sneakily crept to the spot and started digging as soon as the tight dragon was out of sight. BOOM came an explosion and Sylvester was blasted into pieces. He was hit by a trap.

With the cunning mind that allowed the tight dragon to top various tests during his schooling days, he never overlooked the possibility of wild animals unearthing that particular spot. He laid a butanol bomb, meticulously calculated to provide just sufficient thermal energy to raise a typical animal's body by approximately 500K when the activation energy is overcomed.

That was how the idiom, "curiosity killed a cat" came about.

Tweety immediately flew to the spot, only to see a gleaming streak of light emerging from the soil. He clasped his tiny feet onto the parcel and little did he know he just unlocked the secrets of the PW secret.

Something magical happened. The secrets of the PW secret (n) flooded Tweety's body to the extent his volume (V) increased according to the Ideal Bird Equation (PV=nRT). The expanded and expanded until he took the form of a human being. He renamed himself Daniao (big bird in Chinese) to commemorate his past form.

He took the PW secret and flew to a land far far away...

After the defeat in which tight dragon anticipated, he scoured the debris for the PW secret which he buried, but to no avail. He was devastated, he thought that it was destroyed during the battle with 铜子. With all hopes dashed, he returned back to his hometown a better man.

10 years later... Daniao, a formidable marksman, brought the PW secret back to 中原 (middle plains) and claimed to be the lord of the land. As the PW secret resurfaced, the countless sects, clans and legendary characters in 中原 eyed on it in unison.

Daniao feasting at a restaurant in 中原 with exclusive 10% off.

Hence, a 武林大会 was held to determine the owner of the almighty PW secret. The location was set in a renown forest called the 斯文森 林. Warriors from all over 中原 came to claim their share of the PW secret.

The epic event was chaired by 伟健兄, a guardian of the forest.

伟健兄 (looking at the invitation list): "What the... 480+ people coming to 斯文森 林? Eh every clan can only have a maximum of 25 representatives hor! Inclusive of GST!"

Upon hearing that the PW secret resurfaced and the posibility that the scandalous truth between 铜子 and Koreanna might be exposed, 铜子 immediately came back to fight over the PW secret.

伟健兄: "Eh 铜子, I have heard how u overthrew the tyrannic tight dragon and freed Koreanna from his devilish claws! I shall salute you with my shiny sword!"

*Salutes back*

Tight dragon, upon hearing about the reappearance of the PW secret, returned to 中原 with his girl, Annie, to claim what was rightfully his.

Tight dragon secretly oogling at girls from 佴眉派 while Annie is texting.

Tthe 武林大会 attracted a couple of calefare too!

They include the Yellow Monk from the Platinium Mountains. He never tasted the frosty, tangy sensation of powdered cheese before. Back in his mountain, they only had Platinium Winter flavoured mooncakes and doughnuts.

Yellow Monk: "Do they charge for cheese here?"
Waiter: "No"
Yellow Monk: "Yeah~ then i spam. Cheese is nice, though it is as white, but it is not as nice as mayonaise."

Yellow Monk enjoying the "free" good.

Another one be the legendary 东哥aka 东方神奇.

He was determined to get his hands on the PW secret, regardless of the cost.
东哥: "Nundaska!"

SHE was also stopped by before their 世界巡回演唱会.


AngMohPai people like 马克 and 莫克 were there to fight over the PW secret.

Mark: "Heh how do u find the plan that I suggested yesterday...when my troubles seem so far away?"
Mok: "HEH HEH HEH!"

Last but not least, there were the 好姐妹s from 佴眉 派 (Ermei Gang)

梅婷: "Hehe! I smile like that people cannot see my fringe!"
Lizzin: "STUPID KID! Eh the spoon can eat anot arh?"
Yellow Monk: "Stupid kid, of course can. I show you."

Yellow Monk chewing the spoon and camwhoring.

Lizzin: "Wa really can worh!"

They pretty much came to 抽热闹.

It was a bloody evening as various parties fought it out for the PW secret.

There were conspiracies...

马克 conspiring with 佴眉派 to 趁(地震) 打劫.


东方神奇 Chemspiring with 伟健兄.


Tight dragon and his girl conspiring to oust marginal competitors like the Yellow Monk by bribing him with Golden Mayonaise. (Platinium Mayonaise was unavailable)

Apparently, it was effective.
Yellow Monk: "Mayonaise, by any other name, would taste as sweet!"

There was also violence.

马克: "Give me the freaking PW secret DANIAO before...all my troubles seem so far away!"
Daniao: "Hehehe!"


梅婷 employing the underhand method under the table to kope brownie.


Discuss what discuss? 童子直接 snatch the PW secret from Daniao.


Daniao protecting what was initially thought to be the PW secret but was later found out to be just icecream.

In the end, Daniao got to keep the PW secret, but everyone lived happily every after.

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